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"Planet Schmanet, Janet" es una canción de las producciones teatrales y cinematográficas de The Rocky Horror Show desde 1973 hasta la fecha. La música y letra fueron compuestas por Richard O'Brien con arreglos originales de Richard Hartley.

Letra Original (1973)

Dr. Frank-N-Furter:
Ok, it's startime
Riff Raff set the sonic transducer on
Programme 8, secure all levels at zero

Magenta:
Relax!

Dr. Everett Scott:
You won't find earth people quite the easy mark that
you imagine - this sonic transducer! It is I suppose
some type of audio vibratory physiomolecular transport device!

Frank:
You better believe it, baby

Brad Majors:
You mean...?

Scotty:
Yes, Brad - it's something we ourselves have been
working on. But it seems our friend here has found
a way of perfecting it - a device that is capable of
breaking down solid matter and then projecting it
through space and who knows, perhaps even time itself.

Janet Weiss:
You're going to send us to another planet?

Frank-N-Furter:
Planet - Shmanet Janet
Tell you once, won't tell you twice
You'd better wise up Janet Weiss
Y'apple pie, don't taste too nice
You'd better wise up Janet Weiss

I've laid the seed, it should be all you need
You're as sensual as a pencil
Wound up like an 'E' or first string
When we made it, did ja hear a bell ring?

Y' got a block. Take my advice
You'd better wise up Janet Weiss
The transducer will seduce ya

It's something you'll get used to
A mental mind-fuck can be nice

You'd better wise up Janet Weiss
You'd better wise up, build your thighs up
You'd better wise up

Narrador:
And then she cries out

Janet:
Stop!!

Frank-N-Furter:
Don't get hot and flustered
Use a bit of mustard

Brad, Janet, Scotty, Rocky, Columbia, Riff Raff y Magenta:
You're a hot dog
But you better not
Try to hurt her
Frank Furter

Janet, Scotty, Rocky, Columbia, Riff Raff y Magenta:
You're a hot dog
But you better not
Try to hurt her
Frank Furter

Janet, Rocky, Columbia, Riff Raff y Magenta:
You're a hot dog
But you better not
Try to hurt her
Frank Furter

Janet, Columbia, Riff Raff y Magenta:
You're a hot dog
But you better not
Try to hurt her
Frank Furter

Magenta:
You're a hot dog
But you better not
Try to hurt

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Producciones
Teatrales: The Rocky Horror ShowProducciones de Reino UnidoProducciones de AméricaProducciones de Australia

Cinematográficas: The Rocky Horror Picture ShowThe Rocky Horror Show LiveThe Rocky Horror Picture Show (2016)

Personajes
Brad MajorsJanet WeissDr. Frank N FurterRiff RaffMagentaColumbia
Rocky HorrorEddieDr. Everett von ScottNarradorAcomodadoraTransilvanos
Álbumes
Original London Cast RecordingRoxy Cast RecordingAustralian Cast RecordingMovie Cast Recording
New Broadway Cast RecordingGlee Cast RecordingNew Movie Cast Recording
Canciones
Science Fiction / Double FeatureDammit, JanetOver At the Frankenstein PlaceSweet Transvestite
Time WarpSword of DamoclesCharles Atlas SongHot PatootieCharles Atlas Song (Reprise)
Touch-a-Touch-a-Touch-a-Touch MeOnce In a WhileEddie's TeddyPlanet Schmanet, Janet
The Floor ShowRose Tint My WorldDon't Dream It, Be ItWild and Untamed Thing
I'm Going HomeSuperheroesScience Fiction / Double Feature (Reprise)
Fotografías
Fotos de obras de teatroFotos de la película de 1975Fotos de la película de 2016